Macau CLOSER recently spoke to a number of accomplished women in the city as part of our March-April issue cover story "A Balancing Act". Excerpts from all those interviews are included in the cover story. Below is the full interview response from Victoria Man, Director of Events & Projects at O Media & Instide Asian Gaming.
Born in Macau, Victoria has a multicultural and diverse work background, with work experience in Macau, Hong Kong, Portugal, South Africa, Mozambique and Angola. She is fluent in Portuguese, English and Chinese (Cantonese and Mandarin).
She also holds a Master in Law from the University Classica of Lisbon, Portugal. She has held a range of diverse positions including Director of Business Relations in Angolan Steel Ltd. and Project Director of Chung Fung (PYT) Ltd, a South African based group. Victoria returned to Macau in 2016 and lead the Business Awards of Macau until November 2019. She is experienced in media relations and events and is passionate about connecting people from different countries and industries.
Victoria is currently responsible for all events organized by O MEDIA and its flagship media brand Inside Asian Gaming, including the Asian Gaming Power 50 Black Tie Gala Dinner held each November, the G2E Asia Awards held each May and the Macau After Dark series of industry networking events, among others.
She is also responsible for government relations, public relations and community relations for O MEDIA as well as overseeing existing and developing new special projects for the group.
In general, what has been your experience as a woman growing up and living in Macau?
There are many different communities with different cultures in Macau, namely the Portuguese community, the expats community, the local Chinese community, the greater Chinese community and many more. It is easy to get lost with our identities and our point of view on gender equality here.
In my experience, the Chinese communities have a fixed image of women, created by the media, TV series, and some celebrity or local gossip. Once the community establishes their idea of what constitutes a good girl or a bad girl, this becomes dangerous and could limit women’s talents and freedom. We should be true to ourselves and go for what we believe in, I do believe it is the only way to let a woman feel secure and confident. However, when we get a job here, we need to balance between adhering to community perceptions and the true expression of our personality and beliefs.
It is quite funny, in my experience the only place where I had people asking me if I am dating a rich guy or if I want to date a rich guy is in Macau. This never happened to me in Europe, where I spent my early 20’s. When I was studying in Portugal, my friends told me well-behaved women rarely make history, and my focus was always on traveling.
However, I think women in Macau in some way get some more benefits when compared to women in Europe. Guys here would like to pay for dinner and do everything to treat girls. In Europe usually boys and girls would split the bill and take care of themselves due to a sense of gender equality.
How do you feel about Macau as a city in terms of career opportunities for women? And in your field in particular?
My career experience in Macau started in the legal world, and I’m now engaged in the media, events, and gaming industries. Everyone knows women are famous for multitasking.
The majority of employees in all of these industries are women, but the majority of seniors in these industries are men. However, I do believe that in the future, there will be more and more female leaders. The gaming industry, specifically, is an interesting case, there are not many women working in management in this industry, but the ones there is, are usually in a very high position.
Therefore, I won’t say women have fewer opportunities in Macau, we also get the benefit that many wise male seniors would like to be our mentors. However, I would say that it is just more difficult to be a woman in any career, in terms of balancing family time and gaining respect from others. As women we usually need to work harder to prove our wisdom and gain respect.
What are some of the major challenges or pressures for women in Macau?
To gain respect, no matter whether they are men or by women. I hope society and men can support and give more appreciation to women who want to be appreciated by their talents, personalities, wisdom, and strength instead of their face, body shape, or charm. We should reconsider our attitudes toward women.
There is an ancient Chinese saying: ‘A woman who lacks talent is virtuous’, meaning that women should stay at home. There is also the modern equivalent: a dumb-looking woman is more attractive, meaning that some women even ‘dumb’ themselves down to boost men's egos. So, you can see the traditional expectations towards women and their image. I would never say a thing against these attitudes, I only know that this is not me and I won’t lie about that.
Do you feel that women are discriminated against in Macau in any ways?
Maybe in a verbal way, yes.
For example, in a career, when a woman is ambitious, some people would call her a dragon lady, but when a man is ambitious, people call him a smart guy. For me, if a lady is ambitious but she doesn’t do harm to others this is amazing.
Men sometime out of jest will say something sexist or make some sexist jokes, for example, some men like to judge or comment the girls’ beauty and body shape in public. I think this is because they get used to saying those things to get closer or establish bonds with other men or they need to boost their egos. So, I don’t really care that much about what sexist jokes they may say.
Likewise, I have met many good friends and gentlemen, who are confident real man, who always behave in a very polite way to women. So, for me I can’t say discrimination towards women in Macau is in a very serious level.
What areas would you like to see improvements in, in regards to women’s empowerment and opportunities?
Lifestyle, image of women, social judgement and expectations on relationship.
In Macau, I feel a bit tired to see people expecting that a winner at the game of life is a pretty lady with a rich husband, especially in the media. I think the media has a huge responsibility on this.
I don’t know when this became a trend, I think it is not fair to the men either. I remember that in one very old interview Cher said: “ When I was a little girl, my mom told me, one day you are going to settle down and marry a rich man. I replied: “Mom, I am a rich man.”
Her meanings being that we don't discriminate against men. I just try to say that when we get married, it should not be based on necessity nor what our parents said. No matter we are men or women, we have the power to be a human, we have the power to choose our own lifestyle, and together, we have the power to change the society’s expectation on women’s image.
In terms of opportunities, I would like to see men accept more women as their friends and respected buddies during social networking or in “the gentlemen's club”. Also, to give more opportunities to professional women to enter male dominated businesses.
What advice would you give to young women in Macau in terms of their future education, careers and family issues?
It is ok to get lost but don't forget to find your true self. Without knowing exactly what you want and who you are you will never feel secure. Once you enjoy being yourself and are not afraid to be alone, you will feel secure and happy. Then you will be capable to love someone you deserve because it will not based on necessity or confusion.
For careers, I would advise that we should focus on ourselves. Don’t get into any war that is not worth a fight, but if we believe that something is right, we should stand up for ourselves. We should also not be too harsh on ourselves or feel too guilty when we need time to rest or when the project is not perfect.
For family issues, since I don’t have kids, I don’t feel qualified to answer this one.
As you look around the region and the world today, what issues stand out to you as being most significant when it comes to women’s rights and opportunities?
In Macau, and in many international cities, I think women’s rights are protected. In the worst case, when you are not accepted by one community, you can always jump to another community. For me LGBTQ rights should be protected more and be treated seriously here. If a man feels that he was born a girl or vice versa, we should accept that he/she was born this way, it is natural and human.
I know that in some villages in mainland China, some places in Russia and India, and some other regions in the world, the culture is still very conservative and sexist. Girls there do not have a chance to receive an education or their parents treat them very cruelly or abandon them because they are not a boy. These girls were basically born to be hostages kidnapped by their parents. We should do our best to save them.
